A breast cancer diagnosis at age 41 in 2018 tore my life apart and then put it back together again. Cancer presents serious physical, mental, emotional, and financial burdens, which are difficult to understand unless you have experienced it personally. Living in rural Vermont with family and friends far away made it even more difficult. Being relatively young, I realized the people I knew and loved, both in Vermont and outside, had no experience supporting someone with cancer, which added an additional layer of isolation.
Cancer is frightening and many people are not able to address feelings connected to deep fear and mortality, which often means avoiding the topic — or people with cancer. Well-intentioned words and actions can unfortunately have negative and hurtful impacts, part of why communication is one of the more challenging components of a cancer diagnosis.
From my personal experience facing breast cancer, I offer the following suggestions for how to communicate with a friend, neighbor, colleague, or family member with cancer.
WHAT TO DO
• Be In Touch for the Long Haul: Texts, messages, emails, voicemails, and cards help us know people are thinking of us. Don’t take it personally if we don’t respond, and don’t give up — we WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU and knowing that you care helps. Please understand that repeating our story can be very traumatic, especially in the early parts of a diagnosis or treatment. But, later on, we may really crave a conversation with you.
• Mail a Gift Package: Simple, useful, and soft gifts in the mail can add feelings of love and gratitude to the day. I really appreciated receiving homemade cards and art, cozy socks, tea, journals, window prisms, and anything that portrayed warmth, comfort, or light.
• Send Money or Gift Cards: Cancer is expensive and every bit helps. The financial burden impacts everyone, even if we have health insurance. Coop gift cards were a favorite and most of us need supplements and more nourishing foods, which are expensive.
• Don’t Wait To Be Asked For Help: Respect how the person with cancer and their caregiver choose to communicate. If there is a meal train, a care calendar, a Go Fund Me, or other form of support set up and shared through social media or community, consider yourself asked. Please don’t be offended if we are not able to reach out to you individually.
• Ask What Support is Needed: “Let me know if you need anything, I’m here for you” is a challenging statement to hear. As is offering support when you are not informed of what is needed. Ask the caregiver how you can help ease their burden and understand they may be inundated early on, so please keep offering throughout treatment and recovery. Can you start or manage a meal train, care calendar or Go Fund Me? Drop off fresh or frozen food? Give rides or pick up items at the store? Watch children and pets? Help do some yard work or housework? When might the person with cancer OR the caregiver want a visit?
WHAT TO SAY
• You actually don’t have to say very much at all. Stay in touch beyond the initial diagnosis and first stage of treatment and don’t disappear. Actions speak louder than words, so see above.
• Share stories. Tell us about something you really appreciate about us or positive impact we’ve had on your life. Or tell us about something happening in your life — it can be a welcome break to take the focus away from cancer.
• Talk to your own friends and family. Your feelings about health, illness, fear, and mortality are important to process with someone you trust, just not the person with cancer.
• Reframe questions:
- ASK “What are you doing today” or “How are you feeling today?” INSTEAD of “How are you?”
- ASK “What have you learned recently?” INSTEAD of “How have you been?”
- ASK “Where are you at in treatment?” INSTEAD of “Do you have to have chemo?” or “Are you in remission?”
 
PLEASE DO NOT
• Don’t assume. All cancers are different. There are many stages and types. Not all cancers are life threatening and not all treatments are the same.
• Don’t make it about you. Your own fear about mortality, the loved one you lost, the article you read, or your advice or opinions about our treatment plan or decisions are intimate details that may be appropriate if we’re having an intimate conversation, but not for you to send in an email or share when you see us at the store.
• Don’t give gifts with sugar or alcohol. Both of these feed cancer. But also don’t judge it we drink or eat sugar. In fact, please don’t judge us at all.
Cancer is overwhelming, especially at the beginning when everyone wants to help. A few months in is when I really needed the most love and support and at times it was hard to find. Losing friends and family to judgement and assumptions was very painful. Many people who I thought would be there for me disappeared.
However, one of the most beautiful parts of my journey was when people I didn’t know very well showed up and offered the acts and words I share above. I built new friendships out of my experience with cancer that are based in reciprocal compassion and for that, I am deeply grateful.
Connect with Rae and learn more about her experience with breast cancer at www.Facebook.com/RaeCarterEmpowr

You may think that you should be resting during treatment and not exerting a ton of energy on your body however, recent research actually shows the importance of exercising during treatment. Exercising during treatment can boost your physical functioning and your quality of life. For example, it improves balance which in turn reduces your risk of falling, improves blood flow to your legs which reduces your risk of blood clots, and it increases your self-esteem. 

Okay we get it, exercise is good during treatment but HOW should I be exercising? Your ability to exercise and how you should be exercising depends on certain factors such as the type of cancer you have, the treatment you are receiving and your endurance level. Your doctor will be able to know what the best moves are for you but a helpful rule of thumb is to take it slow. Maybe one week you try to walk around the house a few times a day and the next week you try to walk down the street. Whatever the activity is it is important to consult with your doctor beforehand and listen to your body.  ​

When diagnosed with Cancer it may feel as if your life has been flipped upside down. You feel several emotions and it is hard to know what to do next. During treatment among the various side effects, your body is going through so much physically and mentally. Simple tasks such as eating can be difficult. Whether you are experiencing nausea, dry mouth, loss of appetite, or any other factors that come with treatment we are here to give you some strategies to help you combat the problems that make eating difficult.  

Eating during treatment can feel more like a chore than something you look forward to. From intense smells to your taste changing, and several other factors it is important to figure out what strategies will promote a diet that works for you. For example, instead of eating the normal 3 meal diet, try to snack more often throughout the day with 6 to 8 small meals. This will feel less overwhelming and will get you the daily nutrients you need to have a successful treatment. 

Now you may be asking, what do I eat? High protein and starchy foods such as chickpeas, tofu, cheese, turkey, nuts, peanut butter, etc. are all good sources of nutrients. Avoiding intense spices such as garlic and serving food at room temperature or cold can help with the overpowering smell of food. However, while it is important to be eating foods that boost your immune system and give you strength, it is more important that you are eating than what you are eating. Therefore, if you want a chocolate bar for breakfast then eat a chocolate bar for breakfast and always have your favorite snacks on hand. ​

Save the date for the 5th annual Culinary Classic, November 16 from 5-9 p.m. at the Burlington Hilton. Click here.

 You can be a Hope Hero to a local cancer patient and their family.  A cancer diagnosis can be financially devastating. Many local patients struggle to not only access medical treatment but to meet the basic needs of their families. You can sponsor one local cancer family for $400 or $33.33 a month.

Some patients delay treatment simply because they cannot afford the gas to put in their cars; others make difficult choices between taking life-saving medications or feeding their children. The Cancer Patient Support Foundation (CPSF) has been providing emergency financial support for local cancer patients and their families in Vermont and Northern New York for more than 18 years. The need is growing.

“Many patients are unable to work while they are in cancer treatment,” explains Sarah Lemnah, Executive Director of CPSF. “They tell us they are more worried about the money than the cancer. As they struggle to afford the cost of transportation to hospital visits, prescriptions, and medical costs not covered by insurance they also grapple with how to take care of their families.” She continued, “Expenses like rent, food, childcare, and utilities still need to be paid and many of our patients have no income for months. It is heartbreaking to hear these families so stressed about the money that they are unable to focus on getting well.”

“Cancer changes your life in one day.” Cyndi of Waterford, VT explains, “I went from having a great job able to work 40 hours a week with two incomes to only one income, and it was all a blur.” You can be a hero to patients like Cyndi and her family. For each Hope Hero donation, a custom Vermont Teddy Bear with our “Hugs, Hope, Happiness” logo will be given to a local patient in treatment, or you can give to someone in your life touched by cancer. Cancer does not discriminate; CPSF’s patients range in age from 2-93 years old. You can make sure that one local family receives the support they need to get through this difficult time and know that they are not alone.

CPSF has seen an increasing need. In just three years there was a 268% increase for Emergency Fund dollars. More than $382,000 was awarded to local patients in Vermont and Northern New York from 2017-2019; and more than $2 million since the fund’s inception. Each year more than 600 families are supported by CPSF thanks to the generosity of our donors in Vermont and Northern New York.

Support a local cancer patient and their family. All funds stay locally in Vermont and Northern New York. For more information go to www.cpsfvt.org/hero or call 802-488-5495.
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The Cancer Patient Support Foundation (CPSF) is an independent nonprofit organization which supports cancer patients and their families, in Vermont and Northern New York in a time of extraordinary need, by providing financial assistance, underwriting counseling services, and acting as a resource during diagnosis, treatment, and recovery. 

Burlington Wine & Food celebrates it's 10th Annual Grand Tasting by supporting the Cancer Patient Support Foundation. For each ticket bought at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/burlington-wine-food-10th-annu…, the Cancer Patient Support Foundation will receive $10 to help a local cancer patient and their family.

Burlington Wine & Food offers 300 wines, 14 restaurants, and 30 artisan food & spirits producers. This is your opportunity to taste world-class wines paired with creations by top chefs from Vermont & Quebec, artisanal cheeses, specialty foods and live jazz on the shore of Lake Champlain.

An all-inclusive ticket provides a full guest experience of wine tastings and menu samples from restaurants leading the farm-to-table movement.

Also included are fun and informative demonstrations on the all-new CULINARY STAGE in the main tent, featuring celebrity chefs Michelle Ragussis of Food Network Fame, Kevin des Chenes who is "Private Chef to the Stars" and author of “Beyond My Chef Coat”, and Chef Plum who is a multi-time winner on Food Network "Chopped: Open Your Basket" and more.
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There’s no better way to enjoy a summer Saturday in New England than sipping and relaxing while looking out on the water. It’s what makes this event a favorite for visitors and locals alike!

Get your tickets today!
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/burlington-wine-food-10th-annu…

On Sun., August 11, over 200 runners, walkers, volunteers, colorectal cancer survivors, and caregivers will join together in the fight against the nation’s No. 2 cancer killer: colon cancer. Get Your Rear in Gear® − Colchester is a family-friendly 5K Run/Walk planned to raise awareness and encourage screening for this largely preventable cancer.

Celebrate survivors, support caregivers, and remember those who left us too soon. Stroll the Blue Mile and see tributes to those lost and messages honoring survivors of colon and rectal cancer.

"I recently witnessed the difficult journey of a friend of mine during his treatment and recovery from colorectal cancer. The life changing impact of this diagnosis and the stress it caused on him and his loved ones was painful to see,” says Sarah Lemnah, Executive Director for Cancer Patient Support Foundation and local event director for Get Your Rear in Gear – Colchester. “I am honored to be a part of this event both on a professional and personal level. The Cancer Patient Support Foundation works with local colon cancer patients and their families as they struggle through diagnosis, treatment, and recovery. I want to encourage all Vermonters to understand the importance of screening for colon cancer. This is a disease that when caught early is so treatable. Please, do not be one of those people who got diagnosed too late."

This race is planned by local volunteers with help from the Colon Cancer Coalition, a national organization that hosts over 40 events across the country to educate and raise funds for colon cancer screening and prevention. Money raised through Get Your Rear in Gear – Colchester will be granted by the Colon Cancer Coalition to build and fund programs in the Green Mountain State aimed at increasing colon cancer screening and early detection of the disease. Funds raised in past years provide patient services including financial and emotional support to colorectal cancer patients through a grant to the Cancer Patient Support Foundation.

Just the facts about colon cancer:

• One in 23 Americans will be diagnosed with colon cancer during their lifetime.
• 51% of adults 50-54 have not been screened.
• New recommendations from the American Cancer Society encourage colon cancer screening start at age 45.
• Colorectal cancer is a leading cause of cancer incidence and death in young adults under 50 in the United States (National Center for Biotechnology Information at the National Institute of Health). 
• 1 in 5 colorectal cancer patients are 20-54 years old.

​Sun., Aug 11, celebrates the 12th Get Your Rear in Gear event in Colchester. The 5K run/walk starts at 10:00 a.m. Registration information is available online at ColonCancerCoalition.org/Colchester. Information about volunteering, fundraising, sponsoring the event or forming a team is also available on the website. Colorectal cancer screening information as well as a list of symptoms and other information about the disease can also be found on the website.
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About the Colon Cancer Coalition
The Colon Cancer Coalition is a non-profit organization based in Minneapolis, Minn. dedicated to encouraging screening and raising awareness of colon cancer. The organization’s signature Get Your Rear in Gear® and Tour de Tush® event series are volunteer-driven in communities throughout the United States. In 2017 the Colon Cancer Coalition granted over $1 million dollars to local communities that will build and sustain programs promoting early prevention, screening, and patient support services for this disease. By making the words colon, colorectal and colonoscopy a part of the everyday language, we believe we can overcome the fear and decrease deaths from this largely preventable cancer. For more information visit ColonCancerCoalition.org. 
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​Chef Shawn Calley, the Executive Chef of the Burlington Country Club, was named the Culinary Cup Champion for his smoked chicken stuffed with apples, goat cheese, and sage. This is the third win for Chef Calley. Chef Evan Leavy of the Jericho Cafe & Tavern won the People's Choice Award for his house smoked brisket with blackstrap molasses, apple relish, and cornbread crumble. Other chefs competing this year included: Chef Christian Kruse, Vergennes Laundry by CK; Chef Donnell Collins, Leunig's Bistro & Café; and Chef David Hoene, Pauline's Café.

For Calley, the mission is what is important. "I feel so fortunate to live in a community that supports and takes special care of people in need. I am honored and humbled to have been able to be involved with The Cancer Support Foundation for the past several years and love seeing many friendly faces year after year when I hand them a dish. More importantly, I feel privileged to be able to do my part, however small, in helping to make a difference with a foundation that has such a great impact to the folks that really need it."
 
This year the Culinary Classic Cup judging panel included celebrity chef Kevin Des Chenes of the Food Network's "Beat Bobby Flay" and " The Great Food Truck Challenge". Chef Des Chenes explained why Chef Calley was named the Culinary Cup Champion, "though all 5 dishes were great, Chef Shawn's dish hit all the points we were looking for: texture, taste and an overall composition of the  dish. It was also very important that we picked up on all flavors and components in each chef's description of their dishes and Chef Shawn delivered."
 
More than $100,000 was raised to support local cancer patients and their families. Proceeds from the event benefited the Cancer Patient Support Foundation (CPSF). Last year CPSF's Emergency Fund distributed over $223,000 to 649 local cancer patients throughout Vermont and Northern New York. To find out more about CPSF and how you can help go toCPSFVT.ORG. The Culinary Classic was presented by NorthCountry Federal Credit Union.
 
The Cancer Patient Support Foundation (CPSF) is an independent nonprofit organization which supports cancer patients and their families, in Vermont and Northern New York in a time of extraordinary need, by providing financial assistance, underwriting counseling services, and acting as a resource during diagnosis, treatment, and recovery.

The Victoria Buffum Endowment Committee at the University of Vermont Cancer Center has awarded the Cancer Patient Support Foundation's (CPSF) Emergency Fund $47,000. This fund provides emergency financial assistance for local cancer patients and their families.

Many of CPSF's patients report that they are more "scared about the money than the cancer." CPSF hopes to minimize that fear by providing financial support to cancer families in crisis. The Emergency Fund provides assistance to families to remove financial barriers to cancer treatment and help them meet their most basic needs. Today the CPSF Emergency Fund supports nearly 650 families each year. Since its inception this fund has awarded more than $2 million to families in Vermont and Northern New York. Cancer patients too often need to make difficult choices between paying for much needed prescriptions, or transportation to treatment instead of meeting their families’ basic needs including food, heat, and childcare. Requests to the Emergency Fund have risen dramatically. In 2016, $190,000 was awarded to 509 patients; last year, $223,000 was awarded to 649 patients.

CPSF would not be able to provide this level of support without our community partners like the Victoria Buffum Endowment. Since 2013 this fund has awarded CPSF’s Emergency Fund more than $150,000 to support local cancer patients and their families receiving treatment at the University of Vermont Medical Center. Buffum lost her battle with cancer in 2002 at the age of 58. According to the UVM Medical Center website, "She wanted to ease the burden of individuals (and their families) trying to understand their illness and move through the challenges of treatment. She funded this endowment through her generous personal philanthropy in support of her goal.” "

The Victoria Buffum Endowment has enabled CPSF to meet the needs of hundreds of local cancer patents," said Sarah Lemnah, CPSF Executive Director. "Victoria Buffum's legacy lives on in the patients we are able to serve due to her generosity and desire to lessen the burden on individuals and their families."

 Click here for more information on CPSF’s Emergency Fund.